Of the handful of great books I read in 2021, Life is in the Transitions by Bruce Feiler was one of them. The hundreds of life-changing stories he shares as part of his Life Story Project alone make the book a worthwhile read. But more importantly, understanding the term “lifequake”, how many we can expect to go through in a lifetime, and the increasing frequency we can expect to experience them, put context and clarity around what I’m hearing in conversations with clients and friends these days.

Through his deep research into the topic, Feiler says that in today’s world we are facing “an epidemic of breaches” – or disruptors and disturbances. Some are voluntary (like adopting a child), some involuntary (like being fired from a job). Some are personal (like getting a diagnosis) and some are collective (like a global pandemic). Taken individually, many of these are par for the course of a normal lifetime. But when a few of these pile up and occur simultaneously (like losing a home + getting a divorce + totaling your car), they qualify as a lifequake. This is due to the compounded levels of devastation and destabilization they can cause as well as the aftershocks that can ensue for years.

While reading about the concept of lifequakes, I coincidentally found myself in an increasing number of conversations with clients and friends about their own “pile-on” events; multiple disruptions that were occurring at the same time and which appeared to be personal in nature. (Unlike the pandemic which is happening to everyone). One person might report a toxic manager plus a relationship upheaval plus a life-altering illness. Another might report a failing business plus a gender-transitioning child plus a home relocation. On the face of them, these seem personal and exclusive to the person experiencing them. Which of course they are. But looked at as a phenomenon, under the ever-present canopy of a global pandemic that just won’t end, it makes me wonder what cosmic lifequake might be going on that is manifesting as personal (and yet different-in-manifestation) lifequakes for individuals.

Feiler mentions “The Butterfly Effect” – the discovery by meteorologist Edward Lorenz in 1961 that tiny influences in one part of the system can transform the outcome in other parts.  Which lead to the famous question – “Does the Flap of a Butterfly’s Wings in Brazil Set Off a Tornado in Texas?” – and the basis of chaos theory.

I’m not going to propose that chaos theory is the reason why scores of people seem to be experiencing life-altering events at the same time. But something collective appears to be going on. Has the global “wing flapping” of the pandemic created energetic ripples that are causing seemingly unrelated personal disturbance and upheaval?

Whether yes or no, people seem to be experiencing suffering of one degree or another. I share this perspective at a minimum, to let folks know you’re not alone if you find yourself in the midst of a lifequake. Your neighbor’s lifequake might look different in form, size and shape from yours, but chances are that someone you know is having one.

And not surprisingly, there can be an upside to such massive disruption. The chance to clear the slate, take the risk, try something new. Whether we choose it or the choice is made for us, the portal to trying a different way can open via a lifequake. A quote from famed Austrian psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor Viktor Frankl comes to mind:

“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”

As we head into a new year with hopes that 2022 will begin sloughing off some of the restrictions of the past two years, I hope the disruptions in your life are not of the lifequake proportion. But if they are, take heart in the fact that you’re not alone, notice where you have agency to make a new choice, and know that a partner to walk through them with you is just a phone call away.